Our perception of the world varies from one person to the next. Each person has a slightly different makeup or package, which makes perception slightly different. This is our filter. The filter creates a sense of individuality or subjectivity. The filter is the mechanism we identify with as "me." It includes our senses and is what separates us into individuals with likes, and dislikes. Sight, sound, touch, smell, taste, knowing or intuition. These are all tools we use to perceive the seeming separate world.
Our individual senses allow us to perceive and make judgments on what is true or real for us, and what is not. Therefore, the only Truth that can be known is that which we perceive through our senses. We think of each sense as separate entities, but they all have one thing in common - they are all faculties of the mind. Without the mind to register the perception, the sense organ is useless. When something has been seen, we do not know this from the eye. The information goes from the eye to the mind and then the mind says, “I see it.” The mind interprets: I smell something….I hear something…..etc. So all of these senses are seemingly one tool - the tool of perception. They are the extensions of Mind to interpret Reality. This is the only way we can know the world. We can know other's opinions and ideas, but only through our interpretation - our filter. This leads to subjective interpretation every time.
If our reality is subjective, what value does the validation of others hold?
For one, other's opinions and validations can act as a mirror for us to see once more if we agree or disagree. Often, it gives us another angle to consider, but ultimately our perception is all that's left. If this is the only way we can perceive the world, others can never completely validate our experience…they cannot have a direct window into us. They can only validate our experience from their perception of it. They can know our experience from what we tell them or they witness – what we seem to be doing, seeing, thinking, etc.
This leads us to trust our own interpretation rather than one we received second hand. It allows us to make choices from a place of power. When we let others determine this for us, we give our power away. Often, we look to others for approval or disapproval. Are we loved, are we right, are we safe, are we OK? Only we know the answer.
Usually, we are OK. We are stronger than we think we are. And it is the personal journey through these transformative times that awakens us. I believe pain and discomfort are some of our greatest teachers and that we deny ourselves opportunities when we sweep them under the rug and ignore them. Pain is not always a negative. It is our interpretation of pain that is negative. Sensation is just that – a sensation felt through the senses: physically or mentally/emotionally. It can be used to alert one that there is danger, or that a course correction is in order. Physical pain can act as a guide to help redirect us during the course of our lives. It is to be respected….as is love, or any other gift.
Emotional pain allows us to learn about humility and feel empathy for others. It reminds us we are vulnerable. Next time you feel pain or discomfort of any kind, try just sitting with it a moment. Feel it. Talk to it as if it were a small child by asking it simple questions like “What are you doing here?” Or, “What message do you have for me?” Find its relevancy to your life. It can be a doorway to further peace.
In some cultures, life trials and pivotal points are celebrated and used to strengthen one’s character. One honors the changes that life brings and they may meditate on its significance or take an inner journey to understand themselves further. One such occasion is childbirth. Childbirth is a miraculous occurrence and the pain and intensity are an integral part of the celebration. The pain or sensation can feel strong and powerful, but is not “bad.” I have had two children by natural childbirth methods and wouldn’t trade the experience for any. This is LIFE. You miss living when you drug it or cover it up.
Copyright 2007 Jennifer Ables Conn
